1,2,3 Breathe – 1,2,3 Breathe – 1,2,3 Breathe

The words that went on for what felt like a century as my older sister fought to keep my sweet Jet living and breathing. As Jet was born, I didn’t see his face, I didn’t get to hold him, I didn’t get to hear him cry. I remember thinking, why isn’t he crying? As I laid helpless on the bed waiting for the placenta to pass and to be stitched up, Joel guarded me – covered me, so I wouldn’t have to be witness those difficult first moments. I heard a room at war to keep him breathing and his heart beating.

1 – 2 – 3 – Breathe….CHANDRA JIMENEZ

Emergency responders were in and out and swept my boy to the NICU at a hospital a mile away. With my sister the only family by his side, I didn’t know what the coming hours would look like. Nearly a week passed before I was able to hold Jet in my arms. They told us over and over again that no two deliveries are the same and I pray that rings true so that no mom ever has to experience what I have.

Be Still My Anxious Heart

As Jet was transported out. My spirit just kept repeating be still my anxious heart, be still, be still, be still, be still…

In that moment as Joel was praying over me Psalm 46:10 swept over my spirit. But scriptures command was going against everything my flesh was calling for. Saying “get up”  “run”  “fight”  “control”  “don’t let him go”.

Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth! PSALM 46:10

My spirit found comfort in the truth that God is in control and that he loves us. That we can be still and trust that all things will work together for those who love God. So I took my foot off the gas, asked God to hit the breaks, and prayed asking Him to give abound us with peace to carry us through whatever was to come.